 "Photo: Joe Mignanc")
According to the monologue “Vagina Happy Fact” from Eve Ensler’s “Vagina Monologues,” “The clitoris is pure in purpose. It is the only organ in the body designed purely for pleasure. The clitoris is simply a bundle of nerves: 8,000 nerve fibers to be precise. That’s a higher concentration of nerve fibers than is found anywhere else in the male or female body, including the fingertips, lips and tongue; and it is twice, twice, twice, the number in the penis.”
Considering the electric power encased in this highly evolved piece of pleasure, it is perplexing that so many of us find ourselves completely dumbfounded by the confrontation of the clit. Indeed, some may even think of it as “Nature’s Rubik’s Cube” because there doesn’t seem to be as obvious a method of “reaching the stars,” as there is for its masculine counterpart.
What to do with the tricky little thing? First, you have to understand what it is and accept that whereas the clitoris is similar to Excalibur, it is not a female penis and therefore the Golden Rule of “do unto others as you would have them done unto you” does not apply.
The clitoris is a complex structure with both external and internal components. The little red riding hood sits front and center where the labia meet at the base of the pubic mound. Under the clitoral hood, the head, or glans, is made of soft tissue that expands and becomes firm when excited. It can vary in shape and size, though it generally ranges from the size of a pea to a fingertip. Altogether, the entire organ is about four inches long.
What you can see is only the tip of the iceberg. From the head, a shaft extends into the pelvic region and splits into the crura, which resembles an intact wishbone. Each crus is made of erectile tissue and together, they surround the area of the urethra corresponding to the G-spot. Below these crura are the vestibular bulbs of the clitoris that fill up with blood when the woman is sexually aroused, causing the glans to become larger and harder than when it’s feeling bored.
Concentrating only on the head of the clitoris is abandoning a wealth of carnal possibility, for the entire terrain is rich in orgasmic material. That said, let us now turn our full attention to the clitoral focal point. There should be no trouble in finding that sweet rosebud, or alternately, the “V-Spike,” yet anxiety over marking the spot persists.
Ah, but you psych yourself out, much as you do when you arrive at the bra clasp in the second act of the undressing ceremony. No matter how much of an artist you are in peeling off her jeans, it just so happens that even the most dexterous of fingers sometimes find themselves foiled by those two little hooks. Even so, most women will kindly reach behind and unhook their bras for you.
The clitoris is an infinitesimally more personal facet of a woman’s sexuality than her bra, so naturally, she will help you get there too. Far from embarrassing, it is very intimate to ask her to place your hand right where it feels good for her, or else to ask her to show you with her own hand how she likes to be touched. The woman’s guidance in her own sex is crucial. I have yet to hear of a woman who enjoys receiving woodpecker action from your finger about four miles southwest of the mark.
But then we have you hardheads who are so afraid of what looking lost might imply that you’re not willing to pull over and ask for directions. Instead, you insist that you’ll figure it out yourself but just get further and further off the path.
The act of pleasuring a woman is not an exam in which one is expected to display all prior learning, as previous studies may not apply to the new subject. Engaging in physical acts of passion with another person is a collaborative work of art, not just one person acting upon the other. If you are indeed a knowledge-hungry scholar of sex, you must bear an open mind, research your material and ask good questions along the way. Education should be a lifelong pursuit.
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