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Heart Beat

by Ole Moley

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Love is being able to be your most genuine self and knowing you’ll be accepted.

It means your heart melts when you hear their voice or when they dance with you in the rain outside of Mohn.

The person you love can push all of your buttons, but also knows when you need them to be a comforting presence.

It means committing to a partnership, where open and honest communication is key.

So what makes a good relationship? Honestly, it is important to distinguish that what makes a good relationship for you does not mean it is the same as what makes it “normal.”

“What makes a relationship beautiful is the little moments you remember.” – Ole Moley

Often-times, we are fed a specific model of what makes a relationship good, whether it be perceived attractiveness, heteronormativity or excess romantic gestures.

But what makes a relationship beautiful is the little moments you remember – whether it is your partner holding your hand as you fall asleep or how they look when they smile at you.

Being in a relationship means being with them through everything.

Sometimes people think that the defining quality of a relationship means wondering how you would feel if that person wasn’t in your life.

However, this is not the best way to judge how good a relationship is because any person you get to know on a vulnerable level is going to be hard to let go of.

The difference is when you truly love someone you know that – no matter what – life is better with them there.

No matter how you define love, we believe the foundational elements that make love genuine are honesty, trust, respect, attraction and attentiveness.

Honesty and trust go hand-in-hand. To have a relationship with someone you have to trust them and you have to trust they will live up to their promises.

They will be honest (sometimes even to a fault) and that, maybe most importantly, they are in love with you as much as you are with them.

Before you can engage in a healthy relationship you have to know who you are. A relationship shouldn’t be what defines you. A relationship should allow you to be your best self and your partner needs to respect that.

“Honesty and trust go hand-in-hand. To have a relationship with someone you have to trust them and you have to trust they will live up to their promises.” – Ole Moley

Attraction doesn’t just mean physical attraction! It’s first and foremost a desire to have the other person be present and important in your life, whether that be physically, emotionally or categorically.

Lastly, attentiveness requires you be there for your partner when they need you, even if that means going out of your way to do so.

Ultimately, there is no one way to be in a relationship with someone. At the end of the day, we have found that if you feel most at home when you are with them, that is a pretty good sign something is going right.

Sincerely,

Ole Moley